Sunday marks the end of the 12 day Baha'i festival of Ridvan - I think I have described this in the past as "a couple of holy days" because I was thinking of them in terms of the key days of the Ridvan season, which happen to be the days we don't work. I should explain that Baha'u'llah, the founder of the Baha'i faith, announced his station as a messenger of God to humanity while living in exile from Iran in Baghdad, Iraq. The 12 days of Ridvan commemmorate the 12 days Baha'u'llah spent in a garden in Iraq called (renamed) the Ridvan garden. Ridvan (pronounced Rezvan - actually, I'm not sure because different people pronounce it differently - I pronounce it Rezvan, anyway) is Arabic for paradise. The events that occurred in the garden inverted an otherwise gloomy situation because Baha'u'llah was on the eve of being further exiled to Constantinople (then, part of the Ottoman empire as was Iraq - and if you're at all familiar with the work of Tin Pan Alley, or They Might Be Giants, you're well aware that Istanbul was Constantinople; now it's Istanbul, not Constantinople).
The first, ninth, and twelfth days are specially commemmorated. This year the ninth and twelfth days fall on a Thursday and a Sunday - which means a four day weekend for many BWC staff. So we are currently amidst a lot of family visitors, regular visitors, even visitors for a wedding, plus approximately 400 pilgrims. Some staff have balanced out this population dynamic by going out of town or even travelling abroad for the weekend. I myself am going to Akka, the Carmel forest on the outskirts of Haifa, and the beach, but nothing more special or far-reaching than that (that may sound like a lot but these are some of my most regular hang-outs - I just happen to have time to visit three of them in a single weekend).
I've been living a little higher up the mountain for about a week now. Combined with a work (and free time) schedule that has been too busy for me, living in a much busier area with many more Baha'is (come to think of it, that is a part of why my schedule has been too busy) has been draining for me and I'm going to need to make a special effort to not do so much for a while. A lot of things are making me feel mentally worn out. There are all kinds of activities to take part in, but I'm starting to feel that for me far too many of them are too, well, studious. I have a friend who practices playing water polo twice a week and occasionally plays games on weekends. It takes up a very large portion of her free time, but she loves it, and she's not always either sitting in front of a computer or with her nose in a book or workbook or study sheet or administrative message or whatever. Plus she gets to spend some time with Israelis which I'm still struggling to find an suitable avenue for doing just once in a while - so I don't feel disconnected from the world, which I'm really not - I just happen to be living in a milieu of enough mostly native English speakers to fill a small town.
I hope moving up the mountain wasn't a mistake. I wanted to be closer to activity when I wanted to take part in it. Now I hope I won't get sucked into everything and if I want quiet time, I can have it. My new roommates are nice but one of them, although she has nothing if not a good heart, might be a bit of a challenge for me to live with because she seems to have quite a maternal personality - I consider myself a big girl able to take care of myself, so...we'll see how that goes.
I've been spending lots of time in the shrines, which I've felt I've needed, though I don't understand why - I'm aware this happens to a lot of people shortly before they leave - after all, when will they be back? - but I'm not leaving soon. Maybe I'm homesick. I am feeling a little restless, while exciting but ideas are forming in my head about how to proceed with my career, and the kind of adult life I'd like to have. I've been thinking about how I've always felt kind of displaced. Now I'm definitely displaced. The BWC only happens to be where it is because of a string of exiles some 150 years ago (see the first paragraph). Maybe I need to feel more anchored to someplace. OK, where? What's home? Right now the only place that feels like a real (accessible) home is inside the shrines.
Friday, April 30, 2010
Thursday, April 15, 2010
15 April
I've been so occupied in the last few weeks that the thought has crossed my mind many times to update my blog, but no more than that. I say "occupied" instead of "busy" because "busy" seems to imply that one is fulfilling obligations to the outside world. A lot of what has been keeping me occupied has been personal and individual and very positive. It's my feeling that as this introspective phase that I have been going through recedes at least for a while, it's soon going to be replaced with a phase of being much more active in my community, which is very positive also.
On Wednesday of last week I acquired a new flatmate - just as the one and only one I've had for seven months borders on leaving. It worries me that she doesn't know what she's going to do when she goes home - how you can go home after a year and a half of living in a foreign country with no plans for the future is not something I can understand - but it makes me happy that she told me recently that she's very interested in going into journalism and writing about human rights issues. Some sort of work like that would definitely fall along the lines of what she has been doing all her time in Israel so it will be great if her last 18 months give her a head start in her chosen field.
On Friday last week she had her goodbye party. I asked specifically if we could have a lot of music, not because I love it (though I really do) but because I've noticed that it tends to make everyone happy. I was the only person at the party who was not Persian or married to a Persian (or engaged to a Persian) so most of the music was Persian or Arabic. Five people approached me later and either apologized or teased me for being subjected to so much Persian music. This was at the same time very funny and completely incomprehensible to me. Music is music. I was not familiar with more than one of two of the songs, but it didn't really matter. I had my wish.
My roommate is friendly and pleasant. She's from Canada, studied communications, and seems smart and healthy and balanced. Unfortunately I won't be living very long with her. I took a flat offer much closer to my office - it makes me happy that I've been asking around to see who will be living in my area and maybe 90% of the people I've asked will be living within a few blocks of me. I didn't fully realize before how many BWC staff members are concentrated within such a small radius.
I have a week to get my things together. In the meantime I am really looking forward to a beach picnic on Saturday. Two weekends ago I went on a long hike through a very hidden little forest that winds through Haifa and the path took my companions and me to the beach, so we had played in the water a little bit (and I saw my first jellyfish outside a zoo - we stayed clear of it) and napped on the beach. Before that I hadn't been to the beach since sometime in January (I know, my life is so hard). So I am really looking forward to this weekend. A lot of African friends will be there and they are always a joy to be around because they are generally contagiously happy.
In addition to the beach outing, I'm also looking forward to a couple of upcoming holy day observations (I'll explain as they occur). A friend from Mexico has commented on my very long hair and offered to style it for such a special occasion as a holy day "with flowers and everything, just like Frida Kahlo". I am looking very forward to my Mexican hairdo.
Besides all these things, what has caused me to be so occupied lately is primarily one thing: reading. I've always loved reading but would never say that I read voraciously, but now my eyes can't move fast enough across the page and my brain can't absorb what I take in fast enough. I'm reading a four volume series called The Revelation of Baha'u'llah which is history of major Baha'i writings (including some of those which have not been translated from Arabic or Persian yet - this is what is most fascinating about this series, that it gives me a window into things I may not otherwise have access to in my lifetime...it can be hard to read at times though because Arabic and Persian human and place names tend to sound very similar to me and it doesn't help that they're naturally rhymy languages). I'm trying to maintain my reading skills in Spanish and reading a very very cute Spanish novel - it's good and old with lots of antiquated language and over-the-top sentiments and it's just fun to read. I'm also listening to Running with Scissors which makes me in turns laugh a lot and raise an eyebrow.
In news that is not related to my life, but makes me very happy, I recently learned that one of the former counselors at Camp New Hope had her first child after her own mother died of cancer - so she asked the wife of the husband and wife who served as camp directors that summer to be her baby's grandmother. She is thrilled at this.
On Wednesday of last week I acquired a new flatmate - just as the one and only one I've had for seven months borders on leaving. It worries me that she doesn't know what she's going to do when she goes home - how you can go home after a year and a half of living in a foreign country with no plans for the future is not something I can understand - but it makes me happy that she told me recently that she's very interested in going into journalism and writing about human rights issues. Some sort of work like that would definitely fall along the lines of what she has been doing all her time in Israel so it will be great if her last 18 months give her a head start in her chosen field.
On Friday last week she had her goodbye party. I asked specifically if we could have a lot of music, not because I love it (though I really do) but because I've noticed that it tends to make everyone happy. I was the only person at the party who was not Persian or married to a Persian (or engaged to a Persian) so most of the music was Persian or Arabic. Five people approached me later and either apologized or teased me for being subjected to so much Persian music. This was at the same time very funny and completely incomprehensible to me. Music is music. I was not familiar with more than one of two of the songs, but it didn't really matter. I had my wish.
My roommate is friendly and pleasant. She's from Canada, studied communications, and seems smart and healthy and balanced. Unfortunately I won't be living very long with her. I took a flat offer much closer to my office - it makes me happy that I've been asking around to see who will be living in my area and maybe 90% of the people I've asked will be living within a few blocks of me. I didn't fully realize before how many BWC staff members are concentrated within such a small radius.
I have a week to get my things together. In the meantime I am really looking forward to a beach picnic on Saturday. Two weekends ago I went on a long hike through a very hidden little forest that winds through Haifa and the path took my companions and me to the beach, so we had played in the water a little bit (and I saw my first jellyfish outside a zoo - we stayed clear of it) and napped on the beach. Before that I hadn't been to the beach since sometime in January (I know, my life is so hard). So I am really looking forward to this weekend. A lot of African friends will be there and they are always a joy to be around because they are generally contagiously happy.
In addition to the beach outing, I'm also looking forward to a couple of upcoming holy day observations (I'll explain as they occur). A friend from Mexico has commented on my very long hair and offered to style it for such a special occasion as a holy day "with flowers and everything, just like Frida Kahlo". I am looking very forward to my Mexican hairdo.
Besides all these things, what has caused me to be so occupied lately is primarily one thing: reading. I've always loved reading but would never say that I read voraciously, but now my eyes can't move fast enough across the page and my brain can't absorb what I take in fast enough. I'm reading a four volume series called The Revelation of Baha'u'llah which is history of major Baha'i writings (including some of those which have not been translated from Arabic or Persian yet - this is what is most fascinating about this series, that it gives me a window into things I may not otherwise have access to in my lifetime...it can be hard to read at times though because Arabic and Persian human and place names tend to sound very similar to me and it doesn't help that they're naturally rhymy languages). I'm trying to maintain my reading skills in Spanish and reading a very very cute Spanish novel - it's good and old with lots of antiquated language and over-the-top sentiments and it's just fun to read. I'm also listening to Running with Scissors which makes me in turns laugh a lot and raise an eyebrow.
In news that is not related to my life, but makes me very happy, I recently learned that one of the former counselors at Camp New Hope had her first child after her own mother died of cancer - so she asked the wife of the husband and wife who served as camp directors that summer to be her baby's grandmother. She is thrilled at this.
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